I have been getting this question a lot lately. So here goes..... Yes, it's true! I've been celibate for 3yrs and 4 months. Can you believe it? I was only supposed to be taking a break. I had started 6 months of cleansing that suddenly took on a life of its own.
I've been asked "how am I feeling and don't I miss making love"? Well, the most truthful answer I can give you guys is that " I miss intimacy"
Making love can be such a beautiful, erotic, kinky and pleasurable act. But it can also be selfish, deceitful, manipulative, compulsive and complicated.
So what do I mean when I say that I miss Intimacy? It means I miss holding hands, making out in public, eye fucking and late night banter. Oh and little licks and sucks along the way. Shit, that can feel so much better and last a whole lot longer than the actually making love.
For those that have followed my journey since 2015. You were there when it all started. For those that wasn't. It was the end of a relationship with a Gentleman that was not my boyfriend. Now, why is that and how did I allow this to happen? Why would I allow someone into my body that I was not in a committed relationship with? Lets just say that he was hard to resist and maybe I wasn't ready for anything serious either?
Dating a man that was not emotional available was not so easy. I never knew who I should be or when he would leave. I was trying too hard because I didn't want something that felt so good to end so soon. Hmmm, I didn't know if he wanted me to be his kinky little secret, his fantasy girl all fun with no baggages, maybe he wanted to see all of my flaws before deciding if I was the one? And what does the one really mean?
Who knows. When someone like me has had one too many relationships with bad boys. Just know I need "the good guy" right now.
The moral of this story:
If you are only hooking up for the fun of it. Have some rules in place so that no one gets their feelings hurt. Heck, even married couples have rules. No cheating allowed. LOL